Adelaide trip
- Dyno Tune by Martin Donnon & Simon at Morpowa
WAS ALL THE
DRAMA WORTH IT??
Months had been
spent on modifications to improve the Nissan Skyline GTS4.
Just one important Dyno
tune-up entailed driving to Adelaide where the experts were, as no local
Garage would cut it.
Anybody not
accustomed to racing suspension would probably find the trip a little
uncomfortable, but not us. The recently installed new suspension, JIC
Adjustable coil overs with pillow balls , although harder, was not much
different to before. Those potholes didn't seem to impact as badly,
although I naturally held on to prevent my head hitting the roof –
instinct!
A less than
generous motor bike member of the police force had effectively put us off
the road for a slightly worn rear tyre a few weeks earlier. Apparently
defect notices require three items, therefore the three good tyres were
included. Considering all the rust buckets and smoke belchers out there, I
thought this was extremely unfair. At least it gave Greg the time to do
the work that was needed to get the car ready for Adelaide – with all
that and an up to date roadworthy, we were ready to go. I defied any-one
to find fault with that car!
(Not sure weather I
like that cop or not. At least he forced me to do everything I had planned
to do - just in a shorter time frame, and now the GTS4 is spot on!-Greg)
South Australia is
a mixture of desert and agriculture, saltbush, mulga, endless, flat dunes.
We had been told it was an eight hour trip – first myth!
Going via the coast
takes longer – we headed off by 9am Saturday, expecting to arrive by 7
or 8pm that night. Luckily decided not to take the Great Ocean Road scenic
route!
Plenty of stops
along the way, but not much to see – all those little country towns all
begin to look the same after a few hours. Once you get past Geelong and
Warrnambool, Portland into
Mt. Gambier, unfamiliarity sets in. Have we really traveled this far
already?
Somewhere along a
dry, dusty , drought ravaged stretch of road, (Narrawong, according to the
infringement notice) we encountered our first unmarked police car – didn't
really see where he came from. There had been a short time where, you
guessed it, the Speedo was not registering correctly – Greg had adjusted
his speed to accommodate this discrepancy. Unfortunately, he was out and
was booked for 116.
Well
not QUITE!! The friendly copper believed me when I explained that my
speed was based on the fact that I had recently checked my Speedo on 1-
the Ballarat Hwy laser checker and 2 - the Geelong Rd laser checker. Both
said that when I was doing exactly 100 K's on my Speedo, I was actually
doing only 90K's!! This seemed to be proved by the fact that whenever I
was cruising at 100 K's on the Speedo everyone was passing me!
So
when he pinged me I was doing 115-117 on the Speedo believing I was only
going 5/7 K's over the limit!
Well, it was our
fault, polite words were exchanged, he even told us where the next camera
was up the road a bit.!
From that point on
, the trip changed from one
of relaxed enjoyment to high alert – is the limit 100 here or 110?
Speedo working now! Slowly through these little towns!
I drove for a way
to give Greg a rest – don't know where we are now.
Sun is setting. So much for the scenic coastal drive soon– can't
see a thing except a crescent moon shining on the water to our left. Very
pretty. Millicent, - heard of
that one. The lights of Kingston – we are through, Meningie – easy to
remember that one-Tailem Bend, Murray Bridge. According to the map, Mt.
Barker is coming up, should be close now. Pass the Harndorf turn-off –
is that the lights of Adelaide in the distance?
Notice all the
trucks and semis –very picturesque coming into Adelaide, down that steep
incline where there are “arrestor” roads to the side for trucks in
trouble.
What happened to
the eight-hour trip? It is now after midnight and fatigue is setting in.
Need to find a motel. No, we didn't pre-book – we have hiked around
Italy and Greece – this will be a breeze.
First, have to have
an idea where the suburb we take the car to is.
Done. Now, the nearest Vacancy sign – not so easy, don’t seem
to be any here, but wait, there’s one, Greg’s decision!
I’m now so tired
I don’t care that it looks a little ordinary. As we pull up to the door
of the end unit I am vaguely aware of the car squeaking loudly – hope
that’s not mechanical caused by just hitting that speed bump in the dark
at 30k’s that should have been about 5!
Now that we are out
of the car, why is the squeaking still there – we’ve stopped!
Must be crickets
outside – it’s everywhere!
Greg goes off to
wash the car – while I start to unpack – too tired, must sleep.
But this incessant
“HEEK, HEEK, HEEK goes on and on and on. What is it? We open
doors, go outside into the alley, can’t identify it. Greg gets on a
chair and bangs on the a/c unit above the door. The noise slows down and
stops. Whew! Sleep at last.
“HEEK,
HEEK, HEEK.
Right, that does it! Bit more banging, bit more investigating, no good,
let’s go! We get a refund – the Manager has no idea what is causing
it. As we drive away, the noise is evident all through the Motel and
car-park. How the other guests could stand it we’ll never know. I
wasn’t too impressed with Greg’s choice and accused him of taking me
to these cheap dives to save money! I have a feeling the car would have
been tampered with in that dark, dreary car park- probably because of the
hoon on the bike yelling out and doing wheelies out there- above the
squeaking!
I tell Greg to
leave the accommodation to me in future – I need a bit of luxury at this
moment. My bare feet actually STUCK to the carpet of that room – isn’t
that reason enough?
We have both gone
quiet now as we head into the City to find my luxury accommodation. It is
after 1am Saturday morning and we have to be at Modbury by 9am. This has
been a 16 hour trip.
A taxi driver
points the way to the Hotels – South Terrace. Pull up to the first one
we see – Holiday Inn, next to The Chifley. Exhausted and probably
looking disheveled we front up to the man at the desk and finally we have
a room. We state that we wish to pay cash and that seems to be fine, he
just needs a card to, “pre-authorise”- fine with me, just let us be
able to sleep. After all, we have done this many times before, including
overseas.
Room 1010, 10th
floor. As we wait for the lift, my tired eyes manage to read the sign
taped to the adjoining lift. This lift is unable to be used due to
severe mechanical malfunction – not a pleasant sight for some-one
like myself who has a lift phobia and some-times has to be pushed in or
completely freezes up and refuses to get in altogether! Probably stems
from the time I was stuck in one, in the dark, for 45 minutes.
However, this turns
out to be the luxury I wanted. No car parking lot for a view, but the
lights of Adelaide spread out all around with the hills in the background,
swimming pools all around, a park on one side and the sound of traffic to
lull us to sleep. Newspaper ordered for the morning and breakfast.
Thank goodness I
get to choose where we stay! Admire the view and turn in about 2.30AM.
Day 2
Sunday
Book the room for
another night – just need to present my card again for the
“pre-authorise” swipe. Then its off to drop off the car.
Have to find our
way back to Modbury.
At an intersection
I notice a police car turning left as we go right. I tell Greg not to do
anything as they will probably be doing a blockie and come after us. I
keep watching as they slowly disappear from sight, but not for long. There
they are coming up behind us fast – wait for the blue light – yes,
pull over. We are already
late, hope the guys won’t hold it against us! We are two minutes away
but now Greg’s forgotten the instructions he got on how to get there
five minutes ago.
Just noticed the
Victorian plates they say, think the car is sitting a little low for
Adelaide. Explain about the new suspension, has probably settled a bit on
all those poorly maintained roads . Just wants to show his partner the
car, have a little look under the bonnet, breath test –again, license
check – again. Greg says seeing you know the area can you tell us where
X street is? Obviously not mentioning we are looking for “MORPOWA”
Give us directions , wish us safe trip! Is this for real?
Leave my baby
(After all it is registered in MY name and we sold my Eunos to buy it!) in
the hands of Martin and Simon at Morpowa and proceed to nearest bus stop
to try to be tourists
Public transport in
SA differs slightly to Melbourne. Buses, that is. After checking out
Rundle Mall we found the City Guides and Information Booth. Being a City
Ambassador myself in Melbourne we had a chat and took photos to show
everyone back home the difference in uniform etc. Hope they come out
because there was precious little photo opportunities this trip. At least
we were off the road! Taking the tram to Glenelg was nice – lots of
shops, restaurants – bit like St. Kilda. Greg’s leather jacket is
still draped over the seat at a cafe somewhere there. We didn’t go back
for it, long overdue for a new one – some one might appreciate it!
Greg was asleep by
7pm that night. His mind is 21 but his body is OLD!
Day 3
Monday
Time to check out
of the Holiday Inn . I had made a small withdrawal at an ATM and noticed
quite a lot of money had gone from my account. so we checked at the local
bank and there were two amounts deducted – much more than we were
quoted. I had a bad feeling about this.
There followed an
altercation with hotel staff who stated that no money had been taken by
them - there was that “pre-authorization” again. They told us
the bank had taken it!
I tried to explain
that I have a debit card, no credit is used and that the money is
definitely gone from the account. Greg was getting louder, and walked
outside leaving me to try to understand what they were on about. Not
before he had told them we won’t ever be coming back and that this was
not how he runs his business. The female person looked sympathetically at
me and asked, “Haven’t you stayed at Hotels before?” My restrained
demeanour changed then as I told her we didn’t have this happen to us in
Italy, whilst staying at The Bristol on the Amalfi Coast! Or in Rome or
Capri! And we had used the same card there – hadn’t noticed hundreds
of dollars missing then! They apparently legally steal from you to cover
themselves against any loss.- a bond. We had just wanted to pay cash and
I’m supposed to have the $ refunded to me in two days. For their sake, I
hope so.
There was a minor
altercation with Greg as the breakfast I ordered had cost us $13 each plus
$4 delivery! For two pieces of toast, a muffin, a yoghurt and those little
butters and jam. We must have
the word ‘naïve’ across our forehead.- or “suckers”.
Not sure which bus
is which, so Greg tries to hail a taxi. Strange looks from a woman on the
street who finally approaches and tells us you can’t hail taxis here.
Don’t know if it was illegal or that the taxis ignore you – have to go
to designated taxi spots. So decide to hail a bus. Must be legal as this
sign says “Hail bus here”.
As we hadn’t
ordered that breakfast today, I was suddenly very hungry so pushed the
buzzer to get off at the next stop. Wrong move.
The bus driver
threw both arms in the air, (whilst driving) and screams down the length
of the bus to us that “you don’t buzz on this bus, it stops at
designated stops only and if you had been listening, you would have heard
me telling this lady here!” As we happened to be right at the back, we
hadn’t. He screeched to a halt , we had to physically open the door
ourselves and as we stumbled onto the footpath dragging the bags behind
us, I loudly proclaimed “Welcome to Adelaide!”
He tore off down
the street as I muttered silent obscenities under my breath. I remember
eating something, I’m sure it was nice. The final bus ride was
uneventful – we made sure it was alright to buzz this time! It was
Monday morning and we were back to pick up the car. Drawing attention to
ourselves with the brand new brakes squeaking loudly at each set of lights
– all heads turning! Damn!
Having been before
through the Adelaide Hills, we were not inclined towards touring any more,
so with the car powered up, we headed back to Melbourne via a different
route – the shorter one!
Greg is the
technical expert but I'm good at detecting car noises and this car was
definitely sounding different. Having worked in the Airline Industry for
many years I was well used to the sound of aircraft turbine engines –
this was one! Had we really got this far in such a short acceleration? There's that jet propulsion again!
However, aware of
the past, we stuck closely to all speed limits. A BMW sped past doing 20
ks above the limit and we chased him for a bit before he turned off. Long
stretches of nothing again – not much to see really. Towns – Kaniva,
Nhill and Dimboola – they made movies here, “The road to Nhill”-
countryside does look familiar.
We had stopped to
attach the aerials to the back of the car – Greg’s obsession with CB
spanned many years and this time it was Leo from Fremantle who told the
tale of his recent retirement and taking up of the hobby of radio. Sounds
like a sweetie. Don’t mind listening to him talk at all.
Stroke
of luck is when talking on the radio I usually take it easy. Following a
semi for a while I thought a good strech coming up will I gunit to pass?
No decided to take it easy then two double bubbles flew around the corner
up ahead towards us just at about the time I would have been travelling at
a considerable speed after passing the semi! Whew!!
Tintinara coming
up, Keith and Bordertown.
Trucks and semis
rule the road out here. Where do they all come from and what are they
carrying? One of them is close to our tail at one stage, dropping back,
then catching up again. Of course we have to stick to the limit now – is
he actually going to pass us?!
Remember the movie
“Duel”? That’s him, right behind us. Hope no kangaroos decide to
jump out in front because there won’t be much room for him to stop –
correction, there won’t be any room for him to stop. Don’t think about
it.
Pulling out to
overtake another huge rig – BANG –
was that us? Car loses power, have to drop back and pull over
quickly. Seem to be sand dunes both sides – and ants!
Quick check under
bonnet, under car – hose from inter-cooler has blown off under boost
pressure. Why didn’t I take photos here? Luckily the hose and clamps
were accessible through the side grill opening. There was Greg, lying on
the road, in those overalls he happened to have in the boot, with me
protecting his head from those huge trucks flying past us. They
practically knock you sideways in the rush of air they generate.
Under bonnet
temperature less than 150 degrees at this time and engine components all cool. Very
impressive. No wonder making so much power on overtaking. Relieved to be mobile again.
Approaching Horsham
now and darkness has descended. Still being stalked by huge rigs, now with
myriads of lights. A kangaroo appears standing stock still in the road,
eyes gleaming, mesmerized. Slight defensive action by Greg – all ok. I
would have been driving this stretch but was feeling weary again. Suddenly
the voice on the CB warns of “dog box” opposite Shell up ahead.
We learnt, years
ago – don’t speed through towns, you are asking to get booked so it
wouldn’t happen – no way.
On my left. I watch
out as we slowly approach.
Yes, there it is,
behind a tree there, lights off. Seconds tick by. Those lights will
probably come on ….about….now! Yes! They should start pulling out -
God they are right behind us! Surely not again. Afraid so – there
go the flashers! Pulled over again.
Both of us out of
the car this time. I threw my arms in the air and said “What now?”
“Just a routine
check” he says. Sure, breath test, licence, the usual. “We do it to
everyone” he says. Well. We’re sure being picked out of the crowd a
fair bit!!! This time, they’re curious about the aerials on back. “You
would find it hard to get through McDonalds drive-through with those” he
says. We don’t tend to go there in this car much, we keep being pulled
over – for nothing! Have a good evening.
Fatigue and a
little paranoia are setting in for the final stretch of the journey. Did I
just see a big koala over there? Expect
to be stopped in Ararat for sure – isn’t there a cop at every street
corner here?
I think I’m
starting to hallucinate – watch out, isn’t that a police car up ahead,
no, just lights on a pole at the side of the road, they seem to flash past
us so quickly, but we’re not speeding! Bachus Marsh, Ballarat, all
by-passed now, Melton, Deer Park, almost home and the time – 10pm.
We have traveled
over 1000 kilometers. AND used half
the petrol on the way back compared to going there. The Dyno Tune by
Martin & Simon at Morpowa has certainly been worth all the drama of
the trip!! Considering the job done by the guys it was worth every cent!
Advice to anyone
contemplating a drive to South Australia.
Apart from taking
speed limits into account and allowing yourself plenty of time, perhaps
think of doing the trip in a nondescript old Kingswood or similar, maybe
brown with an orange stripe down the side or a neutral coloured family
type car no-one looks twice at.
Or a speeding BMW
or Porsche with no front plate.
Not in a lowered
black Nissan Skyline, with those number plates, wide mags with red,
anodized rims and knock off centre’s that say BAD, and those radio
aerials on the back.
We may as well have
had a banner attached on back, waving around, saying, “Pull me up!” Or
waved a cop car over ourselves , telling them we’ve saved them the
trouble!
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